Shouldn’t the type and color of the tuxedo be up to the bride?
September 28th, 2009
Cassie asked:
After all it is my day and I think it should be up to me. I decided on this nice white tuxedo that I saw in this tuxedo shop but my fiance didn’t like it and wanted to chose another one that was black and in a completely different design, but I thought it was ugly and wouldn’t go right with my dress plus I’m thinking of the rest of the wedding party and how the color vest and tie I want (seagreen) won’t look right on the suit he liked but he got mad at me and really embarrassed me in the store today. I was so upset about it especially since he said there was no way in hell he was going to wear the one I picked out and he said it outloud in front of the people who worked in the store and my best friend and sister and his brother. I’m currently not speaking to him but that’s beyond the point right now. Anyway, I was thinking it should be up to me since after all it’s my day and my dream wedding what do you think?
Pick Your Babys Gender
After all it is my day and I think it should be up to me. I decided on this nice white tuxedo that I saw in this tuxedo shop but my fiance didn’t like it and wanted to chose another one that was black and in a completely different design, but I thought it was ugly and wouldn’t go right with my dress plus I’m thinking of the rest of the wedding party and how the color vest and tie I want (seagreen) won’t look right on the suit he liked but he got mad at me and really embarrassed me in the store today. I was so upset about it especially since he said there was no way in hell he was going to wear the one I picked out and he said it outloud in front of the people who worked in the store and my best friend and sister and his brother. I’m currently not speaking to him but that’s beyond the point right now. Anyway, I was thinking it should be up to me since after all it’s my day and my dream wedding what do you think?
Pick Your Babys Gender
September 30th, 2009 at 6:05 pm
NO, the guy most control after marriage to the lady. give him this last choice
October 2nd, 2009 at 5:11 pm
I stopped reading at
my day
Shouldn’t it be “our day” or doesn’t he count?
October 3rd, 2009 at 7:16 pm
WOW you selfish b*tch
It’s not YOUR day, it’s HIS too
HE’S getting married, too. NOT just you.
Wowww
If you’re gonna choose his suit then let him choose your dress.
Wow.
October 4th, 2009 at 6:54 pm
This has to be a trolling question, no one is that selfish and self centered to make the statements that you just made. If it is a real question…oh, dear.
October 6th, 2009 at 1:44 am
If I was a guy, I wouldn’t be caught dead in a white tux. Black is classic and goes with everything.
I smell a Bridezilla.
October 9th, 2009 at 6:37 am
A wedding should be planned by both the bride and groom. Both should agree on everything.
If he does not want to wear that color, then you need to honor that decision.
he can easily call the wedding off.
October 9th, 2009 at 10:29 am
It’s not YOUR day; it’s HIS day, as well. He’s the one wearing the tuxedo – maybe he has his reasons for not going with the white one you chose. Back off a little and listen to what he has to say. Please try to remember that it’s not all about you; that there are other people involved in this wedding as well.
Actually, given the comments above, I think you might be a troll.
October 10th, 2009 at 11:52 pm
its not just your day. its his day too. I dont mean to be rude but my honest opinion is that it sounds like you are being very controlling.
October 12th, 2009 at 1:15 pm
I didn’t read the whole thing but here is my answer to the bold question..
“Shouldn’t the type and color of the tuxedo be up the bride?”
Nope.
You pretty much get everything else your way, and if you don’t you sway it your way as much as possible.
It’s a day for THE BOTH of you.
Does he pick your dress or even help?
Probably not.
Let him pick HIS outfit on THE BOTH of your day.
Sheeeesh.
I thought people got married for love.. not anymore.. I guess this is why we live in 2009. No one gets married for the right reason. They just whine and moan over the stupid details.
“I love you..in a different tux. not that one.. I don’t love you in that one.”
Wow.
October 13th, 2009 at 6:41 pm
hon. your both getting married. without the guy there would be no wedding. i would say if he wants to have a say in it then let him. its better then having a guy who could care less about whats going on. its not just your day. so get that out your head. your about to share a life together and you wont be the only one making the decisions. if he doesnt like it. find a compromise. i think your letting the whole dream wedding thing get to your head. you both should be making choices together anyways. why not start now?
October 16th, 2009 at 8:45 pm
The day is for you both
after all you wont be alone at the altar that day will you?
Nevermind with your behavoir as it sounds, you just may.
October 19th, 2009 at 2:12 pm
it is his day too. maybe you could compromise? maybe the style of tux he wants in the color you want or the style you want in the color he wants. it is your day. but it is his and your day. you can’t forget about the groom. he needs to be included in his wedding too. i hope you figure everything out. good luck and congrats.
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:27 am
although i am a bride and want say so in the tuxes, its really up to him what he wants. its not your day. its both of your days. its not just your dream wedding, im sure its his too. thats like him going to davids bridal and saying, “its my wedding and i want to pick out the dress you will wear!”
its not fair.
and the fact that you are giving him the silent treatment shows me that you need to grow up a little and maybe rethink getting married. i mean like, cmon… are u serious?
October 23rd, 2009 at 6:08 pm
The bride should be the on eto pick it out. After all, It is her day. her big moment. If the bride is unhappy, so is everyone else. including the groom. Maybe consider trying different white tuxes to find one that goes right with your dress and that he likes too.
October 24th, 2009 at 7:03 pm
I want to pick out my fiance’s tux too … but he wants to do it himself. I trust his judgement, but even if I didn’t, it’s his day too. So he should get to wear what he feels good in. After all, he has no say in your dress and most of the wedding planning, right?
October 26th, 2009 at 7:28 pm
Letting Your Other Pick Out What They Want Makes It A Unity. If You Choose Every Think. The Other Will Make It A Big Deal. Suggest But Don’t Push. Its Called Control and Guys Are Not Attracted To That, But I Hope He Is Not Controlling.
October 28th, 2009 at 11:31 am
im not trying to be mean but youre making it way too much of a big deal. i mean i understand you want things to be perfect and for things to match, but if he feels that strongly about notttt wearing that one then dont make him. you should both try to compromise, just because its your day doesnt mean he should have to wear something he totally hates.
October 29th, 2009 at 7:52 am
I love a powerfull woman lets meet up and get it on.
October 29th, 2009 at 11:26 pm
Us women have control over almost everything when it comes to planning. As far as I was concerned, as long as the vests and ties matched my bridal party, I was content. White tuxedos really don’t go very well with white dresses… There’s just too much white going on. Think about it and look up some pictures. Maybe you two can come up with a compromise. Try picking out several styles that you really like, and then let him make the final decision.
November 1st, 2009 at 9:45 pm
You must be a troll LoL, you’re pushing every button you KNOW is going to P off people here and get them in a ruccus..
And if you’re not, may heaven have mercy on the poor guy you’re marrying LoL. and because I have nothing better to do, I’ll answer more by saying that I didn’t pick anything my husband didn’t like. I even annoyed him at times because he kept telling me to do what I wanted, but it was OUR wedding.
November 4th, 2009 at 11:06 am
honey its not just YOUR day its his day to. hes getting married as well let him choose what to were if you start being to pushy now it ain’t work. decide on something together and get use to doing that your getting married its not always gonna be about you.
November 4th, 2009 at 9:50 pm
Yes, it is your dream wedding. But he has to wear it. Whatever he wears will match. And he doesn’t have to match the groomsmen. Actually he should stand apart from them. And really think about it. Are you going to be angry because of what he is wearing on the day you two get married? (congratulations by the way!) I don’t think you will. All that you’re going to remember when looking at that photo album isn’t going to be what tux he wore, but how much fun you had, and how great it felt to walk down the aisle in the beautiful gown. But I think you two should find some sort of compromise. If he is dead set against wearing white, find something in a similar style in the color he wants. It’s not only your day. It’s BOTH of yours. Bride and Groom. Though you’re the one to walk down the aisle, he is the one that receives you at the end and holds your hands, looking lovingly into your eyes.
But I do think he should apologize about yelling in the store.
November 5th, 2009 at 7:49 am
I’m hoping this question is not for real. If it is, no I am of the personal opinion that the guy should be allowed to choose his tux. I’m sure you have chose everything else so give him his own wardrobe for heavens sake. FYI it is NOT YOUR day. You do need your groom to show up otherwise you can’t get married so I’d stick with “our day” if I were you. Although based on how you are acting I wouldn’t be shocked if he didn’t show up so it would be YOUR day after all. hahaha
November 6th, 2009 at 8:33 am
Hes your man
It is his special day too don’t forget.
It’s not only about the bride.
He will make himself look fantastic for you don’t worry about it.
If you push him too much he will be thinking why is she pushing me around and telling me I should wear this?
Point is that both of you are meant to surprise eachother on your big day.
You shouldn’t know what he is wearing and he shouldn’t know what you are wearing!!
It’s both a very big day to the two of you and both of you will be happy if you go as you are.
Don’t worry about matching.
If you love the guy you wouldn’t care if he turned up in nice casual gear.
Kinda think you need to chill and give him space to decide what he likes.
Guys aren’t the best at fashion but hey when it’s a special day we dress to impress….
Goodluck and don’t worry he doesn’t want to embarrass you he wants to look good aswell ya know.
November 9th, 2009 at 11:16 am
if he reads this .. GET OUT OF THE MARRIAGE NOW!
hes obviously got his hands full with you bridezilla.
no its what he is wearing for the day so he should choose. would you want him picking out your dress? no. and also its not YOUR days. its for both of you. obviously the colors should go wiht the party .. and your opinion in his tux counts. however if he does not want to wear something you should not make him. its not just ALL about you. its his day too
November 10th, 2009 at 10:25 am
No, dear Bridezilla, it is not “your day.” It is also your husband-to-be’s day. The only way you get to choose the type and color of the tux is if you are the one wearing it.
Whatever, just keep up with the “it’s my day” act and your intended may solve your problem for you by taking note of your stinky pissy attitude and call the whole thing off.
November 13th, 2009 at 12:06 pm
No, the guy chooses it; would you want him to pick your dress? After all this is BOTH OF YOUR DAYS! Stop being a brat, and let your man pick his tux. If I were him and you did this to me, I’d be cutting my losses and running! Grow up and act like someone who deserves to get married!
The color my guy is getting is his fave. color green. It was a shade that matches the shade of purple I chose. See? Compromise!
November 16th, 2009 at 5:05 pm
It’s as much his day as your day. He should look and feel great in HIS opinion. I totally get where you are coming from with wanting everything to fit and stuff, but you can’t dress him yourself for the rest of your life together and I don’t think you should start now.
November 17th, 2009 at 10:22 pm
The day is not all about you. If it was, there wouldn’t be any groom. It would basically be an elaborate sweet 16 party.
The groom picks his attire. He’s not picking your dress for you. You need to call off the wedding and resolve your control issues and grow the f up before you take other people down with you in your misery. You clearly are not mature enough to get married.
November 18th, 2009 at 6:51 am
This is amazing, you deserve a backhand across the face. Let him pick your gown and then you can pick his suit.
Groom if your out there, get away from this selfish being!
November 19th, 2009 at 2:03 pm
If your fiancé is old enough to marry you, then he is old enough to dress himself including choosing his own clothes.
If your fiancé showed good taste in choosing you as his bride-to-be, then he has enough good taste that you can rely on him to choose an appropriate evening jacket.
If you are planning a marriage that last beyond your wedding day, and not just a wedding, then you should plan on respecting your husband’s preferences and tastes, on refraining from attempts to change him, on avoiding battles over non-essentials, and on keeping the lines of communication open.
Start speaking to him right now. Start with “I’m sorry”.
November 21st, 2009 at 8:21 am
Wow, you are micromanaging the wedding and being a bridezilla. I didn’t give my hubby any stipulations and he went by himself to pick it out.
My sister is being exactly like you for her wedding. She wants suspenders, bow ties, and converse sneakers. Also they did the registry together which I thought was weird.
November 22nd, 2009 at 10:05 pm
1. I think the groom should have some say in what he and the men wear. He’s a person, not your accessory on your special DAAAYYY. I mean if he wanted to wear something outlandish like an orange zoot suit or camoflauge, you’d need to work on some kind of compromise, but I think you should have given him guidelines for what you’d like and gone from there, rather than dictating. Some guys don’t feel comfy in white pants.
2. I don’t think you’re ready to be married. Sure, you feel more than ready for your wedding but between you giving him a childish silent treatment and him freaking out in the store, neither of you is mature enough for a serious relationship right now and I think unless you can each give a heartfelt apology — him for losing his temper and you for being controlling and seeing him as an object instead of a person, you really need to call off your wedding now.
November 25th, 2009 at 9:23 pm
Well,
Good luck and congrats! and stop freaking out..its just one day…and most people won’t notice what you think looks “wrong”.
I am a bride right now and it is not exactly without it’s stress. I understand the concern…generally my fiancee has a good taste in clothing, but once in a while he pulls out those baggy patchwork pants that should have never been purchased and wears them out in public. I get so embarrassed but in the end, it’s his choice what he wears. I let my fiancee pick out the tux (which made me incredibly nervous) but he asked me afterward if everything he picked out was ok, and it all matched fine! However, “bridezilla”, who I’m sure is completely reasonable when NOT trying to plan her wedding has a point…the tux should go with the dress, and how is the groom supposed to pick out something that goes with the dress unless he’s seen the dress (which shouldn’t be the case). The two of you need to compromise ( what is something two mature adults who are going to get married should be practicing)…maybe let him pick out his 3 favorite styles and you choose one of them…or you pick out 3 styles that match the dress and let him pick one out and choose the custom items…such as the tie…shoes…etc. Although everyone was so hasty to call you names, they may not have been through this situation before or had more trust in their fiance’s styles choices. Like I said, my fiance has great style…except for a couple items..and I don’t want that time to be on our wedding day. Notice I said “our” wedding day